Curiosity Leads to Intimacy

Day in and day out we feel things,  emotions and/or physical sensations, and are in reaction to them without ever really realizing it. When the things we do feel are intense, we become acutely aware of them… And acutely identified with them. In my experience, the more intense the feeling, the more I identify with it.

As a result, I you to be curious. Really curious. Really, really curious. When an emotion or physical sensation appears, explore how you feel what you feel, and not why you feel what you feel. Even if it’s the lack of knowing or lack of sensation that is present, explore how that feels in your body. Where do you feel it most? What are its characteristics?

For example, anxiety feels like a contraction in my chest area, a cold, tingly feeling in my fingers, almost numbness, and my heart beats rather quickly, which results in my breath becoming shallow. This is how it feels a lot of the times I experience anxiety or nervousness, and yet it is different every time. Whenever I explore a sensation and I think I know it, a new subtlety will present itself.

Doing this allows us to distance ourselves just enough from our experience so that we can become more intimate with what we’re feeling. Sound paradoxical? If we don’t distance ourself, we get so caught up in the emotion or feeling that we are not able to see clearly. Expressions like “seeing red” to express anger are born from this tendency.

My secret hope is that if you are feeling an unpleasant feeling or sensation, by exploring it you will also notice any strong desire to react will pass. And hopefully anyone you wanted to take your feelings out on would also be spared.